ACHIEVE Parent Training Curriculum

Category: Social Skills

Introduction to Social Skills

ABOUT THIS LESSON
Social skills are a broad group of skills that help us relate to and interact with others. These skills improve our quality of life and allow us to experience success in a job. All autistic children have social differences, but not all need intervention to learn social skills.

There are many common assumptions we make about social skills based on our own personal experiences. These assumptions impact the way we view social skills and often determine the skills we think we should teach.

Think about your own social skills and what benefits you see regularly when you use these skills. Social skills are pretty fluid and change in different situations or even across different days. Are there times when your social skills need improvement?

References

John, R. P., Knott, F. J., & Harvey, K. N. (2018). Myths about autism: An exploratory study using focus groups. Autism, 22(7), 845-854.

Jurevičienė, M., Kaffemanienė, I., & Ruškus, J. (2012). Concept and structural components of social skills. Baltic Journal of Sport and Health Sciences, 3(86).

Lerman, D. C., White, B., Grob, C., & Laudont, C. (2017). A clinic-based assessment for evaluating job-related social skills in adolescents and adults with autism. Behavior analysis in practice, 10(4), 323-336.

Social Skills Goals

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ABOUT THIS LESSON
When choosing which social skills to teach, choose goals that are meaningful to your child. While it's sometimes easy for us to choose skills or behaviors we think are important or should change, these goals should benefit your child, not anyone else. Many behaviors you might have trouble understanding are important to autistics. Be careful not to change a behavior just because it makes your child look different than his peers.

References

Baker, M. J., Koegel, R. L., & Koegel, L. K. (1998). Increasing the social behavior of young children with autism using their obsessive behaviors. Journal of the association for persons with severe handicaps, 23(4), 300-308.

Han, H.S., Kemple, K.M. Components of Social Competence and Strategies of Support: Considering What to Teach and How. Early Childhood Educ J 34, 241–246 (2006). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10643-006-0139-2

Teaching Social Skills

ABOUT THIS LESSON
Teaching social skills should be fun and motivating for both you and your child. Let your child take the lead by watching how he reacts to the activities you suggest. Social interactions are sometimes difficult for autistic children and you want your child as relaxed and happy as possible through the process of learning.

Avoid pressuring your child or requiring that he participate in activities for long periods of time. Some children enjoy these activities and will ask to participate. Allow him to choose how long an activity lasts. He doesn't need to play the game to the end to benefit from it.

Think about activities your child enjoys and how he learns best. What teaching strategies might be most effective for helping him reach his social goals?

References

Cote, D. L., Jones, V. L., Barnett, C., Pavelek, K., Nguyen, H., & Sparks, S. L. (2014). Teaching problem solving skills to elementary age students with autism. Education and Training in Autism and Developmental Disabilities, 189-199.

Gould, E., Tarbox, J., O'Hora, D., Noone, S., & Bergstrom, R. (2011). Teaching children with autism a basic component skill of perspective‐taking. Behavioral Interventions, 26(1), 50-66.

Laugeson, E. A., Frankel, F., Gantman, A., Dillon, A. R., & Mogil, C. (2012). Evidence-based social skills training for adolescents with autism spectrum disorders: The UCLA PEERS program. Journal of autism and developmental disorders, 42(6), 1025-1036.

Navigating the Sibling Relationship

ABOUT THIS LESSON
Siblings don’t always get along—and that’s normal. But when one child has developmental delays or support needs, the sibling dynamic can be even more challenging. Jealousy, misunderstandings, and frequent conflict may leave you feeling overwhelmed or stuck in referee mode.

Sibling relationships take time, structure, and guidance to grow. By setting clear expectations, teaching cooperative behaviors, and reinforcing small wins, you can help your children build a foundation of trust, empathy, and teamwork.

What's Normal Anyway?

It’s completely normal for siblings to argue, compete, and push each other’s buttons—especially when one child has extra support needs. You’re not doing anything wrong if they bicker or if things feel unfair sometimes.

Here are a few reminders that might take some pressure off:

✔ Perfect harmony isn’t the goal.

✔ Small wins matter.

✔ You can’t force a bond—but you can create the conditions for one to grow.

This lesson isn’t about making your children best friends. It’s about giving them the tools they need to live, grow, and play together with as much respect—and as little chaos—as possible.

References

Mokoena, N., & Kern, A. (2022). Experiences of siblings to children with autism spectrum disorder. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 13, 959117.

Orsmond, G. I., & Seltzer, M. M. (2007). Siblings of individuals with autism spectrum disorders across the life course. Mental retardation and developmental disabilities research reviews, 13(4), 313-320.

Quatrosi, G., Genovese, D., Amodio, E., & Tripi, G. (2023). The quality of life among siblings of autistic individuals: A scoping review. Journal of Clinical Medicine, 12(3), 735.

Rosen, N. E., McCauley, J. B., & Lord, C. (2022). Influence of siblings on adaptive behavior trajectories in autism spectrum disorder. Autism, 26(1), 135-145.

Sage, K. D., & Jegatheesan, B. (2010). Perceptions of siblings with autism and relationships with them: European American and Asian American siblings draw and tell. Journal of Intellectual and Developmental Disability, 35(2), 92-103.

Shivers, C. M., Jackson, J. B., & McGregor, C. M. (2019). Functioning among typically developing siblings of individuals with autism spectrum disorder: A meta-analysis. Clinical child and family psychology review, 22, 172-196.

Zucker, A., Chang, Y., Maharaj, R., Wang, W., Fiani, T., McHugh, S., ... & Jones, E. A. (2022). Quality of the sibling relationship when one sibling has autism spectrum disorder: A randomized controlled trial of a sibling support group. Autism, 26(5), 1137-1152.